On Expansiveness and Growth
This year marks my 17th summer at Ghostlight Theater Camp. Over this time, I have seen, heard, and felt change in nearly every aspect of our program. There have been small and large shifts from pool time to classes, show selections to casting, trips & activities. For some, including me, many of these changes have been forgotten, with new practices becoming “how we have always done it,” even while small echoes of the old ways remain.
What has been changed most profoundly, however, has been me. I think back to the summer of 2009 when Steve Borowka, one of the founders of Ghostlight, née Acting Manitou, hired me as a counselor and producer. If one is to accept quantum theories, there is another version of me that continues on a different path while the me we all know is here. I think about other me as I watch current affairs unfold. How would I have responded had I not found my camp community? Would I be engaged or blissfully disconnected?
I can’t dive into that hypothetical, nor would it be useful. Instead, I am confident in my way of being in the world now, on this quantum timeline, and I know I owe much of my worldview to the campers and staff I have known through the years. Here’s a bit of what I know.
Take Care of Yourself and Others
As our current government perpetuates the myth of scarcity, acting in ways that exclude the most vulnerable, I choose to be radically inclusive. I can’t say for sure that without meeting campers 15, 20, and now 30 years my junior, who shared their stories with me and who trusted me to affirm their identities, I would be as expansive in my empathy as I am today. It’s not so far-fetched that I might be a curmudgeonly older human who harumphs at the idea of fluidity. Instead, not only do I try to be intentionally empathetic and open to all, but I have been gifted the ability to see that I, too, am fluid and able to change. Seven-year-old me would love this, and they would delight at having the chance to have a more expansive identity. What if seven-year-old me knew there was a Ghostlight? How amazing that would have been!
Take Joy in All You Do
There is no scarcity, only abundance. Through camp and our campers, I have learned that when we see opportunity through a lens of scarcity, fear takes over and becomes anger and resentment. In building classes and rehearsal spaces designed to include all, I have been challenged to see the world through a lens of abundance, and in doing so, I now challenge the systems that instill fear in others using a scarcity mindset. It is a choice, not a set reality, and we can make small choices each day that affirm this principle.
Commune With Nature
Having been a New York City dweller for 13 of my camp years, my summers in Maine were beacons of light in a concrete year. The smells of morning dew, fresh-cut grass, and a rainstorm coming in now immediately cast my mind and heart back to the flagpole at camp. Communing with nature brings me back to moments dancing in the rain, sitting on the amphitheater stage to look at the stars, night-swims in the pool, and the occasional smell of a skunk that passed through during the night. Communing means “being present with,” and now I have the gift of memory to accompany the present whenever I choose. I do not take it for granted; because of that, I make small daily choices that signal Mother Nature that I love her. I sometimes worry that my small choices are disproportionately scrutinized while larger entities continue to harm our planet with little to no repercussions. So, because of camp, I take steps to move the needle where I can, to vote with not only my interests but the interests of our future campers in mind, who will be rolling down the hill at Ghostlight long after I am gone.
I look at these lessons as gifts. While I have been working to bring theater to young people in Maine, I have been given the gift of a life that is principled, a life I am proud of. This wasn’t why I said yes all those years ago, nor why I continued to say yes each and every summer after. I said yes because I believe Ghostlight has the power to change the lives of our campers, our staff, and our families. What a joy to realize it has had the power to change mine. I hope others in our community are given these gifts and many more.
Chris Murrah has over 25 years of experience in the camp world, with 15 years at Ghostlight Theater Camp. He has seen it from all perspectives as a camper, counselor, and now as co-owner and director of Ghostlight Theater Camp, a place he has called home since 2009. Chris received his Master’s Degree in Theatre Directing from Columbia University and continues to direct theatre and opera around the world. For five years he taught in Yale School of Music’s Graduate Opera program. He is so grateful that Maine is his summer home and loves sharing the beauty it offers with the staff and campers at Ghostlight each summer.
